Well, there I was, sitting at the kitchen table looking out the two picture windows at dozens of birds feeding, several squirrels eating leftover seeds and chasing each other, and two lazy dogs asleep in the sun. Supper was ready to go. All was right with the world. Except.
I have learned to be wary of the word - - but - - or - -except - - or - - unless - - and other such qualifiers. They often are placed to either refute what just was said such as “All prisoners will be released - -Except - - you” or dramatically change the direction of the conversation such as “Of course you can go out for a couple of beers with the boys - - but - - don’t expect me to be here when you get back.”* So when the word “except” creeps into a story it usually signals a problem. And indeed there was a problem on that otherwise calm and beautiful afternoon.
Guilt. Just plain GUILT! Crap! Here I am retired, sort of. Working, sometimes. Playing, sometimes. So why should I feel guilty for sitting on my ass and enjoying the birds? Simple answer is “I shouldn’t.” That intellectual approach is really useless in this instance. And I think I know why. My mother was a lapsed Catholic who always felt guilty about it and that probably changed her genes thus giving me some “guilty” genes. I grew up in a Jewish neighborhood with Jewish mothers always somewhere nearby making me and my friends feel guilty about something all the time. “Well, I waited for you boys to come here after school for a snack. I guess you went to (fill in the name) instead. Sigh” or some such thing.
And at least two other guilt producing circumstances: Sally works hard all day and I don’t, and I was born with a penis (making me a male and thus guilty by birth.) Well screw guilt. I am going to go have a sit and a read. Right after I plant the potatoes and finish the dishes.
*(Let the record show this phrase doesn't relate to any current relationships.)
I have learned to be wary of the word - - but - - or - -except - - or - - unless - - and other such qualifiers. They often are placed to either refute what just was said such as “All prisoners will be released - -Except - - you” or dramatically change the direction of the conversation such as “Of course you can go out for a couple of beers with the boys - - but - - don’t expect me to be here when you get back.”* So when the word “except” creeps into a story it usually signals a problem. And indeed there was a problem on that otherwise calm and beautiful afternoon.
Guilt. Just plain GUILT! Crap! Here I am retired, sort of. Working, sometimes. Playing, sometimes. So why should I feel guilty for sitting on my ass and enjoying the birds? Simple answer is “I shouldn’t.” That intellectual approach is really useless in this instance. And I think I know why. My mother was a lapsed Catholic who always felt guilty about it and that probably changed her genes thus giving me some “guilty” genes. I grew up in a Jewish neighborhood with Jewish mothers always somewhere nearby making me and my friends feel guilty about something all the time. “Well, I waited for you boys to come here after school for a snack. I guess you went to (fill in the name) instead. Sigh” or some such thing.
And at least two other guilt producing circumstances: Sally works hard all day and I don’t, and I was born with a penis (making me a male and thus guilty by birth.) Well screw guilt. I am going to go have a sit and a read. Right after I plant the potatoes and finish the dishes.
*(Let the record show this phrase doesn't relate to any current relationships.)
Image: http://www.psychologytoday.com/files/u506/guilt_got-guilt-button.jpg
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