Whole Foods Theory of Weight Loss

See that cup? Yup, Whole Foods.

I was sitting in our local Whole Foods this morning enjoying a nice fare trade coffee and an organic gingerbread muffin when I had an epiphany.  America is suffering from a massive obesity problem. People are way fatter than they ever were. Babies are fatter. Kids are fatter. Teens are fatter. Adults are fatter.  Hell, even I am fatter than I once was.
So I was sitting there sipping my organic and fare trade coffee and eating my muffin and people watching. The guy two tables down, for example. Eating a big salad at 9AM. Ok, not all that weird. But this guy was using BOTH HANDS, eating like a crab. Two forks. Not a slob (although he did chew with his mouth open) but steady eating. And the people going in and out with coffee or small bags with pastries or the people just shopping and checking out. And you know what? They were ALL FIT AND TRIM. Not a single fatty in place (well, the checkout woman was, er, matronly). Pony tails swinging, beards bearding, sandals and running shoes walking. 
And then the EPIPHANY!! Shopping at Whole Foods, or even just sitting there and enjoying coffee and pastry was the perfect way to lose weight. No troublesome diets, no exercise. Just enter Whole Foods and BOOM! off goes the weight. 
I left after about 30 minutes and my pants almost slipped off. Bet you might see me there most mornings I am in town. Just drinking, eating and losing pounds and inches. 

Image: http://i2.cdn.turner.com/cnn/dam/assets/130811113322-100lb-loss-people-magazine-story-body.jpg