Why Not Notice the Good?

The student emailed a typical request: Can I come see you during your SSS time to go over my last exam? Sure, I responded, come by whenever you can and we can talk. He came in and sat down at a table and waited for me to finish with another student. I sat with him and got out his exam. I started to go over the answers he missed and he stopped me: “I know I got some things wrong, but would you tell me what I got right first?” Ooops. Teaching moment. But not for him, for me.
You see it is all too easy to notice the things that are wrong while either overlooking the things that are right, or at least not focusing on them. All teachers know that you should focus on the strengths of their students while at the same time bringing along their not-so-strong areas. This student wanted to know that I knew he got some things right. So we went over the exam questions in order, and I reviewed his right answers and we discussed why they were right as well as the other not-so-right answers. He was pleased that I saw him as a student that got a lot right, and not so much wrong.
A lesson for all of us in this? You betcha (Thanks Grandpa Search). The next time you go somewhere and notice something slightly off or downright wrong, skip it until you notice all the right things, then if you must, mention the not-so-right things. I think you will quickly find that the world has more “right” than “wrong” if you try this technique. Hopefully what you won’t hear me say is jeez, you need to lose some weight. Instead I’ll say, Boy, that shirt is really cool. What size is it? Just kidding. Notice the good and forget the bad. We all know when we screw up. What we all need is to know that sometimes we do well.

Image: www.cdc.gov/ulcer/consumer.htm