The Miracle of the Woods

We went out the day before to find sign and places to wait in ambush. We found plenty of rooting on the edge of a dry swamp, and I found a hollow tree big enough to hide me and best of all it had a crack that looked out over the swamp. Perfect in every way.
We got into place before dawn the next morning, me in my tree and the other guys where ever they found. We waited. Slowly the sun crept up and the sky lightened. Now I could see the edge of the swamp. Wait. Wait. Then, low but real, the sound of slow movement. Rustling in the dri-ish saw grass. Next came a hunters dream: a huge black pig slowly walked out of the brush towards me. Twenty five yards or so. NO!! TWO!!!! One behind the other. My old Fox double barrel was loaded with magnum 00 buck. Perfect. Two shells, two pigs. Wait. Wait. They came closer and got bigger and bigger. I stepped out of the tree, aimed and fired twice. Perfect hits squarely in the head of both, and both went down.
Then the Miracle of the Woods happened. As I walked up to them, shaking with adrenalin (these were after all my first and second pigs), they started to shrink. The closer I got the smaller they got. Damn. How big are they? Closer, still shrinking. By the time I got to the bodies, or what was left of them, they had shriveled to about 15 pounds each. Babies. Just trying to be big and tough. Walking like adults. Puffing themselves up to look like 200 pounders. I felt like a real dick (pardons all around).
On the way out of the woods later that day, I passed two people coming into the woods with a camera or something. The woman muttered “Jerk. Why kill babies? Stupid hunters!” I wanted to scream “I DID NOT KILL BABIES. THESE SUCKERS WERE 200 POUNDS EACH WHEN I SHOT THEM!!!” But of course I didn’t. And of course they weren’t. They were tasty, though, cooked slowly in a smoker. Sort of pre-pulled pork.
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Abraham, Martin and John

And don’t forget Bobby, and Edgar, and Malcolm and all the rest. (Some might even put all of our military dead in with these martyrs.)
I heard this again over the weekend and had to wonder what the hell we were thinking way back then? And then it struck me like a bolt from the blue: whatever it was, the times are getting there again. Division so deep you can’t see the bottom, lack of respect for the other side, lies flying in all directions, money controlling everything.
Watch out for the next wave of assassinations.

And speaking of songs, don’t forget that there is indeed a bad moon rising.

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Who Would Elect Morons Like This?

The Impact Trickles Out
Restrict access to abortion, reduce broadness of social safety net (reduce food stamps, rent subsidies and access to health care) reduce the size of state payrolls by cutting and privatizing state functions, cuts to education at all levels, roll back gay marriage/gay rights legislation, get rid of pesky regulations like development area restrictions and waste dumping. According to the news services this morning these are the priorities for most of the newly Republican state legislatures. There are a number of different reasons why each is in the list, but the effect remains the same: return to a period when the environment for both people and the natural world was less friendly, less caring, less careful and less concerned with individual rights. The Christian Right and the U.S. Chamber of Commerce along with BIG BANKS and BIG BUSINESSES are all singing “Happy Days are Here Again”.
And why not? They all will get what they wanted when they poured BILLIONS of dollars into Republican campaigns. And the rest of us poor schnooks get screwed, again.
America has the lowest tax rate of all the first world nations on earth. The LOWEST!!! The cheapest gas, the cheapest food, the cheapest housing, the cheapest, ooops, make that the most expensive , medical costs (but by far not the best care), and the list goes on. You would think that someone would take a look at the failing State budgets and figure out that cutting property taxes, already the cheapest of all first world nations, makes things worse. You would think that putting hundreds of thousands of state workers out of jobs (and there goes their purchasing power) would make things worse. You would think - - - . Ah HA! THINKING!!
These morons aren’t thinking past the next election. They don’t care about your future, they care about THEIRS. I wonder what moron would consider electing jerks that would do this kind of destruction to our comfy country.
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