A Tale of Three Visits

I was botany graduate student living in a douche bag apartment off of Red Road in Miami. I worked hard and partied hard. Saturday mornings were sleep in times except for early Everglades field work or fishing. So one Saturday the doorbell rings, I get up, look out the window and see an older woman with a younger one standing behind and off to the side. I open the door, wrapped in a towel, politely say “no thanks” and close the door. Next week same people same thing. But I tell them I am not interested. Next week, same thing same people except I answer the door, open it all the way, completely naked. I ask them to tell me about their religion, they turn and walk away. Never saw them again. I hoped the younger one would come back, but she didn’t.

Two Mormons. Different apartment same deal. I was only a couple of years older than these guys and enjoyed talking to them from time to time. Different guys each time. So this one morning I was in a rush to get out when the bell rang. I answered in a towel, told them I was going to take a shower, get dressed and leave because I had something to do. One of them asked if it was OK to come in and talk to while I got ready. Sure, I said. So they followed me into, INTO the bathroom where I dropped the towel and got into the shower. They talked, I washed. I got out, dried off with then still there, went into the bedroom, with them following and talking, got dressed, walked out with them following, got into my car, said “bye” and drove off, leaving them on the curb with their bikes. Never answered the door for 2 young men in white shirts and bikes again.

But, years later I was living in Charlottesville, VA, about  a mile off the main road. One very cold and snowy morning I was under my truck attaching the chains so I could get out to the main road and two pairs of legs appeared. I said something and one of the pairs of legs asked if I had time to hear some news. I slid out from under the truck and saw two young men, winter coats with 2 bicycles. You guessed it. I told them I didn’t have time, got into the truck and backed out of the driveway. They pushed their bikes out and moved on down the hill. There was a foot of fresh overnight snow on the ground and they couldn’t ride. On the way out I passed a car with a bike rack on the back. You figure the rest. One of them was named Elder Romney. (Just Kidding).

Image:Mormons: http://www.fairfaxunderground.com/forum/file.php?40,file=33840,filename=mormons.jpg

Image: Witnesses: http://www.wordsoftruth.net/wotvol10/wotbulletin10252009_files/door-knockers-2.jpg