My Old Friend George

Found at last!! My old friend George Kistner. We had some crazy times in high school. He had a late 40s Chevy convertible that we used to bomb around in until it blew the engine. Thank god for auto shop. I loved to have dinner with his family, all big people, because the food was good and plentiful and everyone was joyful. I lost track of George in the early 60s when he was working as a chemist for a company that made coatings for labels, so the label wouldn't come off easily. I remember one particular challenge was to fine a coating that Mr. Clean wouldn't remove!! I haven't actually gotten in touch yet, just got the email about finding him an hour ago, but I am really looking forward to contact. See ya soon George, and I bet you didn't forget this teasing call: "George! George Kistner my A**!" We all love you boy.

Car photo: www.flickr.com/photos/80643375@N00/2669287270/

The Future, The Truth and Hope

One of those days when the future looms large for some reason. And it's not a pretty future either. Henry Pollack has just published a book called "A World Without Ice", and documents in very graphic terms what will, read that again, WILL be happening in the next decades centuries and mellenia when, read that WHEN most or all of the ice on the planet will be gone. No room left for platitudes or prayers. Disaster is around the corner and moving inexorably towards us. The world will be facing massive population displacement as the seas unstoppably encroach on the land. Famine, disease, war. Not a pretty picture. And we are the cause. Too many of us using too much of the earth to sustain us. With the population still growing the possibility of turning around the juggernaut diminishes with each birth. What are we to do? Well, that's the question isn't it? If the dynamics for the melting of the ice are already operating and can't be reversed, what indeed. I think the answer is "nothing". We can do nothing meaningful at this point to do more than slow things down a little. Doesn't mean we shouldn't try though. Just around the corner with the beast may be the cure as well. I wouldn't bet on it. No harm in hoping. I am certain that the world that will emerge from the chaos to come will be a well balanced and hospitable one. Probably eventually semi-stone age if there are any of us left. And we will be spared the future disaster of global population overgrowth because there won't be enough fossil fuel left to fuel another industrial revolution. So the next time we cycle we may actually be in a better place. In balance with nature, not destroying it. Now that is hopeful is it not?

Book cover from: www.worldwithoutice.com/

Desperation

He stood before the bathroom mirror. His father's straight razor in hand wondering how he got to this place. The only way out was a quick cut and oblivion. He started to move his hand and stopped short: how could the children ever survive the tableau in the bathroom when they came in the morning to pee? What terrible visions would haunt them and what guilt would they falsely bear for his act of cowardice? Slowly the razor dropped.
This story is based on a poem that a friend wrote about his brush with suicide. I thought at the time he shared it that while it was well written and darkly attractive, it held no real meaning for me.
Some years later I was perched on the edge of a very dark place. In hindsight I know it was a depressed and lonely place, a place with all options closed and no way out. Very early one morning I loaded my 44 magnum with a single cartridge and moved quietly to the family room. I sat a while trying to think of any unexplored options, and found none. The path was clear and best for all. With the hammer pulled back and finger on the very sensitive trigger I slowly placed the barrel deep in my mouth. I thought at least that the pain of life would be over with the sudden pain of death.
Then Dick's poem floated in my consciousness and I though "what will my children think when they hear the explosion? What will they find, and how will they survive?" I knew in that instant where my friend had been, and why he stopped. He saved all of us, and no one knew but me.
The next day seemed brighter, and options that weren't there before seemed to be possible. I had often though of that expression "it is always darkest before the dawn" and wondered how you could tell when it was darkest. I know now.

Photo sources: theinvisibleagent.wordpress.com/2009/05/page/3/
world.guns.ru/handguns/hg100-e.htm

My Three Sons

Some of you will remember the old TV series starring Fred MacMurry (who?). Good sitcom with a message at times. I never really thought that I would have my very own 3 sons. But there you go. Three sons that are as different as chalk and cheese. Matt, Hal and John. Matt is a successful academic coming off a career in business. Hal is a successful business man and a rising star in his company, and John is a successful provider of employment for lots of people. They are all good-natured and hard working. They love life and get the most out of it. Between the three there are two wonderful spouses (spice? of life).

One of the many stories in the family relates to F-11. Many years ago I joked that I had an electronic copy of my will, and if any of them pissed me off all I had to do was hit F-11 and they were out of the will. It became a vague threat of "be careful, F-11 is right around the corner". Or just a murmured "F-11". The truth is that I have never had the slightest reason to invoke the F-11 option, and I doubt if I ever will. These guys are all that anyone could imagine or want.

I keep the option open, though, for old times sake. And you never know. Someday someone may forget an important date, or forget to call ...............